I love reading posts from other beleivers of Christ!! I have not read all your stich,but wanted to ask a question. I had backslided a while ago before the A bomb was discovered 9/06. Since then I have renewed my faith in HIM and have let God take charge of restoring my M.
BUT since I am somewhat new to following HIM again, I am not sure if this PEACE he has given me is telling me I will be fine WITHOUT MY H or if its just God preparing me AND H while we grow in HIM during all of this. Sometimes I get inpatient and I want to just file for the D. My H is living w/ OW now for the past five months. Its like I can almost FEEL God doing his work on my H and also making changes in me. But I guess I just wonder what the this hold is the OW has on my H?
The past two months he has told me (mostly our girls) how he wants to move back,but something is still holding him back?
Please add us to your prayers. Your story is so inspirational to me. I will have to sit and read tonight!
I went to your thread and it appears to be locked up. I will read your thread and then post a response to all of your questions. I will tell you up front that I have come to believe that almost any marriage can be healed...and as Christians we should not file for Divorce even in the case of marital infedelity. Obviously, not everybody here would agree with me...but, I rest in the knowledge that God can heal ANYTHING...including our dead or dying marriages. I also believe it is His will that our marriages be restored. I too will read your thread tonight...and I will also add your family to my prayer list. Thanks for stopping by!
Praising God Daily, Remaining "FaithfulH" Me: 62 W: 62 D:33 S:30 & 31 Married: 40 Years BD: Sep 2006 Piecing: May 2007 2nd BD: May 2014 Working On It: Today
Back when first posted in 12/06? I think I started under the Infedelity form, bu then moved to the newcommers. I hadn't realized my latest thread had locked, I will check.
I am having some conflicting views w/ my mother who is my confidant b/c she has become very bitter lately towards H and I have NEVER seen her like this. She is one true woman of God. Its funny it seems like she is the one angrily venting at me about H and I am quitely listening to her. I (thankfully) have passed on from bitter & resentment. I told H those are ugly flaws that only make your insides rot to death and I am trying hard not to become bitter again.
Thanks so much for replying so quickly. Cant ever get enough prayers ya know!
"If someone were to write a book, telling hurting couples what to do to reignite their love as it was at the beginning of their marriage, how long would the line be to buy the book? God has written a manual called the Bible." - - - - -
DEAD MARRIAGE - COME TO LIFE! -
Scripture to Read - Ezekiel 37
"The hand of the LORD was upon me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the LORD and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. He asked me, "Son of man, can these bones live?" I said, "O Sovereign LORD, you alone know." Then he said to me, "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the LORD! This is what the Sovereign LORD says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the LORD.'" Ezekiel 37:1-6
Is your marriage dead in the eyes of your spouse? Do all your friends and loved ones see you hurting so badly that they want you to get on with your life? What has the Lord been speaking to your heart? Yes, in those darkest hours of your life when you feel like you cannot cry anymore. Your heart is hurting so badly that it feels like it is going to explode and you have had thoughts that you wished you were dead. What is God speaking to your heart? I know that God is speaking one special message to you that you may not believe right now. "I love you. I will never leave or forsake you. Turn to Me for your hope. Nothing is too hard for Me. I can restore your dead marriage."
Bob and I went to lunch with a stander visiting from out-of-state. He shared how devastated he was in the beginning when his wife told him that she did not trust or love him anymore. She wanted a divorce. But God, moved day by day showing this stander even in the worse days of his life, God was directing his steps. Now later, the Lord has given him a pastor who is discipling him and he plans to go to Bible College to become a teacher of the Word of God. Have his circumstances changed? No, but God has given him so many specific scriptures, messages and promises that he has chosen to believe in God's power, trust Him, walk in faith, and choose to fight the enemy who is trying to steal, kill and destroy his marriage. What a testimony this couple will have serving the Lord.
One specific scripture that the Lord gave him was in Ezekiel 37. Have you read that passage recently? I pray that you will read Ezekiel Chapters 36 and 37 tonight for your devotions. You will be blessed. The Lord gave me this same scripture to me 20+ years ago. God spoke to my heart and said, "Your husband and the courts say your marriage is dead, but I am going to breathe new life into it."
By the power of the Spirit of God, Ezekiel sees in a vision a valley full of dry bones. The bones represent "The whole house of Israel." The vision was given to assure the exiles who were in captivity that they would be restored by God's power in spite of their hopeless circumstances. God instructed Ezekiel to prophesy to the bones. The vision was to give them hope and encouragement in spite of their present circumstances. Ezekiel was revealing to the Israelites that they would be raised to back to life and be able to go back to their promised land. They would, also, have a spiritual restoration to faith.
Today ask the Holy Spirit to speak to your heart as you read this chapter in the Bible. You may want to read this as an allegory to your marriage. Allow the Holy Spirit to breathe on you faith, hope, trust and God's resurrection power to bring back life to things that appear to be dead! Your Lord God wants to show the world His mighty power for God to get all the glory, honor and praise when your marriage is raised back to life again.
"So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone. I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them. Then he said to me, 'Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to it, 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe into these slain, that they may live.' So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army." Ezekiel 37:7-10
Your marriage, just like approximately 50 percent of all marriages around the world are dried up, hopeless, with no life or love in the marriages. Couples are play acting, trying to survive and many consider their marriage dead and hopeless.
If someone were to write a book, telling every hurting couple what to do to reignite their love as it was at the beginning of their marriage, how long would the line be to buy the book? Jesus Christ is the answer! God has written a manual called the Bible. The church is the Critical Care unit for all hearts to be resurrected, healed, reignited and filled with unconditional love for each other.
Do you believe in God's awesome mighty power? How big is your God? Does everyone say to you, "Your marriage is dead, get over it, and move on?" Your marriage may appear to be dead right now. I had a big flashing "D" on my forehead saying it was dead! But God! That is right, "But, God!" said, "Trust Me. Have faith! Don't give up. I will restore your marriage. I will breathe new life back into your marriage in spite of ALL your circumstances! Believe in me!" PTL! I made a choice that day and chose to believe and waited on my Lord even when it seemed impossible. The Holy Spirit can breathe in new life into your marriage, regardless of the condition of it today. Your Lord God wants to show His mighty power to you and everyone!
"Therefore prophesy and say to them: 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: O my people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. Then you, my people, will know that I am the LORD, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land. Then you will know that I the LORD have spoken, and I have done it, declares the LORD.'" Ezekiel 37:12-14
Friday starts the beginning of a holiday weekend. May you and I start praying that the Holy Spirit will move and speak to thousands of prodigals around the world to come to their senses and surrender their lives to the Lord Jesus Christ. Right now prodigal spouses are slaves to their sinful lifestyle, but suddenly the Lord will call their name and they will be set free. Pray for your spouse's heart to be softened, their will to surrender to God's way and be obedient to the Holy Spirit's wooing.
You may not know what day your spouse is coming home, as we do not know when our Lord Jesus Christ is coming back for His Bride, but we are to be ready! But know for certain, that the Lord Jesus Christ has paid the price by shedding His Blood for your spouse to be set free from all the bondages and addictions to sin. This weekend pray in agreement with thousands of other standers that the Holy Spirit will breathe new life into dead marriages and new life into all spouses who are living in sin! May God have a mighty harvest this holiday weekend!
"...I will gather them from all around and bring them back into their own land. I will make them one nation in the land, on the mountains of Israel. There will be one king over all of them and they will never again be two nations or be divided into two kingdoms. They will no longer defile themselves with their idols and vile images or with any of their offenses, for I will save them from all their sinful backsliding, and I will cleanse them. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Ezekiel 37:21-24
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Thanks for sharing the Steinkamp's post. It is powerful...as are all of their posts!
Early (VERY early) this morning, I posted the following on my thread over at the FortySixty forum:
Quote:
Dear friends,
It has been many weeks....I actually have stopped in occasionally to check on your threads...but, haven't been involved enough to comment. I hope you understand that right now I have one priority....continuing to follow God's lead on healing my marriage. I believe I am honestly becoming the husband and father that I should have been long ago. Those thoughts don't come from a place of guilt....simply a place of reflecting during the separation on fulfilling God's vision of FaithfulH. I wasn't a "bad" guy...I was actually a pretty "good" guy...but, I was a better man to those who didn't know me well. In other words, I believe I abused my God-given family by being less loving...less caring...less sensitive...more selfish...more arrogant...more controlling...than any person should have been.
So, where are we know? Well, since the reconciliation started almost 3 months ago....every day brings new blessings. I am not overstating how awesome things are when I say that it has been like a 3 month honeymoon! My W and I have spent many, many hours alone....our kids are very independent at 17,19, and 20. We have toured CT and NY vineyards...taken trips to NYC, Rhode Island, and New Hampshire....walked on the beach...hiked in the mountains....sat by the firepit for hours on end. We have talked about the future...and we have even talked about the past...including the separation. The discussions about the separation are the hardest....because I realize how much hurt their is in BOTH of us. This was a surprise to me (yeah, I guess I'm pretty naive too)...since my W initiated the separation and divorce.
I stopped by to share all this because I hope that there is even just one person who is in the pit of despair....ready to give up on their marriage and spouse....who finds encouragement here to stand! Now that I see what God can do when we wait on Him, I believe even more now that too many people give up too early....never knowing if that sudden, unexpected healing was just around the corner. Although I stop in here very infrequently, I continue to pray daily for the healing of your marriages. Praise God from Whom ALL blessings flow!
I am praying in agreement with you, SF...and you, Chicki...and many other "standers" on this board...that the prodigal spouses will come "home"...but most importantly, that they will see the error of their ways and return to their rightful place doing God's work.
Praising God Daily, Remaining "FaithfulH" Me: 62 W: 62 D:33 S:30 & 31 Married: 40 Years BD: Sep 2006 Piecing: May 2007 2nd BD: May 2014 Working On It: Today
Wow FH great to hear your M is back on track...mine slowly gets there
Me 53 H 51 OW 25 Bomb may 06 left june 8/ 06 ILYBNILWY (twice!) 7/6/07 H wants to come home 7/21/07 H comes home 7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW now piecing in earnest
I have come to believe that almost any marriage can be healed...
We'll have to work on that one a little bit more, FH.
Luke 1:37 "For nothing is impossible with God."
I don't read an exception in that verse that allows 'almost'. Satan loves to deceive us that there's 'some' things that God can't handle. It's his utlimate tool -
Genesis 3:
1 Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?" 2 The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, 3 but God did say, 'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.' "
(Here comes the deception..)
4 "You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. 5 "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."
This is his number one trump card. He'll use family, friends, sadly sometimes even ministers of the faith to cause us to doubt what has been given to us by God in his word.
1 Peter 5:
7Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
8Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.
Let me end by thanking you for a wonderful post and a great witness you are presenting to all these hurting people, myself included. I pray that the Lord will allow me the same priviledge when he has finished His work in my family.
