Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums We're separated--What Now? God, the devil or fate?

Maybe not, some guys are just... , yeah, he's a dork.

But sometimes the dorky ones are good at other things like barbecueing.

Tru dat!

Fo'sho.

Amy and I got the same lingo going on?

And WTF did he want to borrow your heals, that is so gay-ish

LOL - no it just reminded me of someone else....flashbacks. Like Vietnam or something.

He wasn't creepy. Funny thing was I knew I had a "date" so I dressed up a bit more than I normally would. I actually asked if he wanted to borrow the shoes and he laughed. Guess not.

P.S. Have not had his cooking, but he cooks dinner every night

Hi, I'm trying to keep up. You're living an interesting life, lucky you.

Maybe I'll learn something from reading your posts. For instance, I think I learned that for women there is a difference between dressing and looking good and looking sexy (you said that this guy asked if you always dress that sexy for work. You were thinking what is it with men, it's just a sweater and skirt - something like that). You were dressed to look good. I think men only see sexy. If they are interested in a women, and she is in sweats, it looks sexy, if she wears a top hat, clown nose, and a sweaty burlap bag, it looks sexy.

But, do you like being told you look sexy, or would you rather be told you look good, on a first date, just getting to know the guy?

By the way, have pity on us dorks who cook and often say weird, inappropriate things. ;-)

LIN - my issue stems from XH saying I dress too sexy for work. It didn't matter WHAT I wore.....for instance, button up shirt and slacks - too sexy. Skirt & sweater - too sexy.

So when he said that, it struck a nerve. A very raw nerve. I am not overexposed in the least. I dress pretty conservatively, but I knew I was going on a "date" so I stepped it up a notch (skirt vs slacks)...

As far as compliments - who doesn't love them? I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt because he is young LOL and doesn't seem to understand us yet (who does! ) but he could have said "you look nice, good, etc." instead of "do you always dress this sexy at work?"

See what I mean?

I see what you mean. How young is this gentleman?

Did your XH have jealousy issues? That's a boundary issue, isn't it. Someone else shouldn't be trying to tell you how to dress.

Aarrgh, I've started about 5 different thoughts/sentences here, then I hit the Delete key 'cause nothing sounds right or makes sense.. Let's see, basically, I just want to engage you in a little more conversation but don't want to pry, admit that I haven't read your entire thread, or say something stupid. (too late)

Shoot from the hip LIN.

Yes - XH had jealousy issues, even before my ONS. I understand after, but before I never gave him a reason. And you're right - no one should try telling me how to dress, escpecially since I've known him for less than a week

Jealousy is an evil, strange, powerful emotion. It's not love. It's very selfish. It's about the person feeling jealous, their desire to control the things the "own" (like you?) and their feelings of inadequacy (I should run a spell check on this). I was never much of a jealous type. After my W's A, I can be overwhelmed with it now, but I see it as a self esteem issue and tell myself that I am as good as the OM, I am as deserving, and I don't need to compare myself to him.

Shooting from the hip: What are you hoping for these days? Are you hoping you and XH can work it out and follow his strange plan of remarrying on your anniversary? Are you so good at GALing that you've moved past that and don't care, or maybe don't even want that any more? How's your daughter doing?