Yes the books are E-books. I also checked out the message board, but did not like it. However, I would highly recommend the two books. They are worth it. I just wish all the wives that are even considering walking away would read it before they got to that stage. Thank God, I found it in time. That was what helped me...plus some great people on this board...to change my mind and try to hang in my M.
I can't offer all the reasons WAW do what they do, because I haven't figured it all out myself and I qualified to be one. It is all so sad for everyone involved....kids, in-laws, grandparents, friends...but mostly W & H.
Take care and talk soon.
Sandi2
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
NDDT - how ya' going? Reminds me of my bowling night. Hope you're not too hung.
Going back a little, you need to get past the OM thoughts. What if you found out she were seeing someone else? What would that mean for you? Would you throw it all away because she started dating or fooling around with some now? Why or why not?
In my sitch, my W has 100% denied that the EA was also a PA. I don't know for sure, but I guess I believe her. I have imagined a PA, I can assure you. If I find out it was a PA, I think I will be (better) prepared to handle it, because I have already experienced it in detail in my mind. And I don't think it would change my goals or plan. It would still hurt like hell, but once the emotions subsided, and the clear thinking returned, not much would change for me.
What, if anything, would change for you? Why do you care/obsess so much? Do you know? What are you scared of?
Nomo
M 39 W 39 M'd 10 yrs; T 14 yrs S7 D4 Bomb 5-8-05 W not working on M 1-22-07; EA 2-22 DB 4-10 S 6-11 No more C Link
NDDT, I know how you feel about just wanting to know. My H wouldn't tell me anything even after he admitted to cheating. Said he wasn't discussing that sort of thing with me, that I had no right to know. All of our friends know about her but they won't say anything to me about it cuz they don't want to get involved. I know she isn't a girlfriend but I just want to find out to the extent that he is involved with her so when his truck was left alone at my house, I of course had to do some snooping but didn't really find anything. I guess that was a good thing. Like Nomo and everybody else tells me, what would that change except hurting me more. I know since we are separated that I should just stay out of that part of his life. Kelley
Me: 41 H: 39 D: 6 S: 4 M-14 T-16 first bomb: 5-12-07 (M dead doesn't really want to work things out.) second bomb: 6-4-2007 (found note he wrote about wanting desperately to be with OW and would have to give up everything) Kelley
Ohhhh lots of responses. I am in kind of a hurry too. Me and my girl are leaving to go camping for the next 2 days, well as soon as I am done typing this........(C'mon dad, hurry up, lets go!!!)
Sandi: if them are ebooks you mind shooting them to my email? I really cant afford to buy em, (cheap, broke......) I would sure like to at least read them though. My email address is in my profile. Just click on my name and you will find it.
Nomo: See above for email. No I am not to hung, I had maybe 6 -7 beers throughout the night I was just a bit buzzed and tired when I posted last night. I wonder what that honey I mentioned last night looked before I had them beers....he he he
quote from above posts:
" What if you found out she were seeing someone else? What would that mean for you? Would you throw it all away because she started dating or fooling around with some now? Why or why not?"
my dilema with this is I dont want to know, because I know it is going to hurt like hell if I find out. I will probably go nuts for a bit. I will probably lose any hope that I have. To be honest knowing will most likely cause me to completely let go.
I want to know because it would definatly put some definition on all of this for me, I would have a better sense of the course I would map out for my future. If she isnt, wel then there is hope, be patient........this could work out. If she is, well bye bye. I am moving on. Sorry if this contrary to alot of peoples thinking here, but it is how I feel. (I reserve the right to change how I feel at any given moment though) lol
Anyways I am in a pretty good place today, but I had better go before my daughter goes into full blown tantrum mode here. Take care all of you fine people. Hope everyone has a fine couple of days, I will.
G
PS bringing DR and 5LL along to read, and my journal to write in.
Yeah. Just got back from camping, it was a good time. Nice sitting around a fire and just having quality time with my daughter.
Thanks for the books Nomo...... and Strange send away, all info is most appreciated.
Taking my girl to her favorite restaurant for lunch, (McDonalds) then out for a swim in the lake. Back home for a bath for her, and a shower for me. Mom comes to get her about 4:30. Then I have this evening to myself for some much needed me time. If I am up to it I might go out for a bit tonight.
I will have more to post later........geez this vacation went fast, got to go back to work in less than 48 hours all ready......
Ohh yeah.......all the while I was camping with daughter, I have to admit I hardly thought about my situation at all!!!!
Reminds me of my bowling night. Hope you're not too hung.
