Have you ever considered buying yourself flowers and sticking them in the house somewhere?
While you don't want to play games, I have a feeling that your H would get very territorial if he had any inkling that you might be dating, or at least attracting other male appreciation.
One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.
I'm curious as to whether or not you think women are the same way in terms of the territorial behaviors (if they get the feeling that their H's are attracting female appreciation or that their H's are dating). In my mind, this seems to be a male issue, but I'd like to know what women like yourself think.
Lyrael has a great idea....guess who's going to buy flowers for herself today? I noticed they have shop quality roses @ Home Depot of all places. 1 1/2 dozen large/prepared $14. I usually just get the reg. bouquet, so this'll be different. Added bonus of getting to enjoy them, thanks!
I like all the other suggestions also Still.
You'll have to think of just the right way to present your trip to see me. That will also have a dual purpose; GALing/detachment from H & creating mystery/showing independence.
"Just when the caterpiller thought the world was over, it became a butterfly."
GD- I was thinking about your question, and I'm not sure it can always be cut as a man/woman thing. I think it has to do w/ personality types. I am a pretty laid back person, but I am also logical. I'm trying to imagine myself as a WAW and how I would react to thinking my H was seeing someone else. For me, I would probably react w/ logic and tell myself that gives me even more reason to walk-away. But that wouldn't be the case for everyone. More intense, emotional types might react very differently. I know that women are usually characterized as more emotional than men, but that is not always the case.
About the flower thing, a freind once suggested to put a rose on my car dashboard and see if I get a reaction from my H. This she did (a long w/ some other suggestions she gave me)herself to her cheating H & it worked like a charm. I tried but h did not notice it. So instead I tried by leaving it standing up on the kicthcen bar counter where I normally put my flowers & sure enough it worked!! H- oh is this what your BF gave you?
Evry now & then I will interchange from flowers to roses, etc. He even makes a comment about why do I still have lipstick on when its so late after work, am I expecting any company??? I use to cover it up ( alittle ) by saying b/c it the ALL DAY WEAR kind of mkup, but now he can think whatever.
I don't know if I can express this well, but here goes;
There's a difference in having the WAS believe that you've actually started a new R, or have began an intimate one & if they vaguely think there might be someone interested in you or you're just spending time w/that person & it's somewhat friend like.
As I think I've mentioned before, when my H told me 3 wks ago that nothing had changed & said he was "Dating", that translated into something that had a pretty negative effect. It did not make me want him more, in fact, it distanced me & turned me into more of a WAS. Which seemed to turn him into more of a LBS.
So, I agree w/IK, just don't know if it's gender or personality.
Also, reading through posts where the LBS is directly confronted w/ a WAS that overtly begins another R, seem to go negative.
It's the making yourself into someone that others would want to be with & the keeping it mysterious that brings their attention back to you.
The other might work initially, but might backfire later.
I'd like to hear what others think also.
Best, Sunny
Just re-read this & came out a little confusing...I think(hope) you'll be able to weed through & put it together.
I think you've made a great point too, but I do tend to think that men are more easily affected by such a concern/worry. I really don't know why I feel this way, it just seems to be reflected in many posts from many different men on this board (and by women like yourself who have caused their H's to have this concern).
