Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy Not sure anymore

cades -

Like I said it sounds good to me. I does seem that you are meeting him half way. LikeI said I wish I know if my W wanted to stay married. I would give her the same latter

Husband

Cades--

I thought it was a sincere and beautiful E-mail, obviously written from the heart--and written by a woman still very much in love. It sounded open-hearted and spontaneous--no accusations. Very generous.

And if H doesn't like it I'll come whack him upside the head. Because not many people, in their lifetimes, receive such letters.

He is a lucky man, I hope he realizes how lucky. Most of us on these boards would give anything to be loved like that.

Yoyo

Cades,

Your email was lovely. On your advice I went and read it and I share your sentiments entirely. I just wish I was in the same place as you are so that I could send an email like that to my H.

Hopefully it won't be too long but as you will have gathered, trust is a MAJOR issue for me.

Hope you get the response you deserve to get for that lovely message.

Hugs

Saffie

Well, I finally just asked him last night on webcam if he had gotten my email. He said yes, but hadn't replied because he had gotten it last night (his last night) and I said that's ok, I was just wondering if you had gotten it. He said everything really is going to be ok, Baby. I said I know.

We talked a little bit about R stuff. Not necessarily our sitch, but R's in general. I told him that I really see R's in a different light now. So many people don't realize that it truly takes effort to keep things good in an M, especially once children come along, etc. He said "well like you said all along, there are going to be bumps in the road." I guess our D sitch & all that led up to it was just a "bump" to him. Bit of a HUGE BUMP to me, but that's ok.

I truly feel HAPPY today. Realized I've haven't felt like this in awhile. I guess I'm finally feeling like things really are going to be ok.

He is in Korea, and he got me a "spank your a$$ outfit" as he called it. It's a little silk pj outfit w/ a robe that has bamboo & tigers on it. It's really pretty. He told me that's all I have to wear while I'm over there on my visit

Honestly, those of you not in a good spot right now, I did not know for a long, long time that H and I would be where we are now. He was deadset on getting a D and said time & again that he didn't love me anymore. Keep your heads up and know that everything will work out in the end for the best. Thanks for everybody's support.

So glad to hear that you are in a good place. Have fun with the spank your *** outfit.
Love, Ali

I guess the only thing that still keeps creeping up and I keep pushing away in my mind is wondering what will happen if & when he sees OW again when he gets home. He ichatted today "I Love YOU" (I haven't said anything about OW or anything along those lines). Although he did go out partying again last night and he said it was the last time. I said "it doesn't bother me as long as you know your boundaries, if you know what I mean." He said he does.

Cades--

Looks like your E-mail should have made some mention of spankings. Sort of like the icing on the cake, you know.

I always wondered that too,, my H's OW is best friends with my SIL.... double . He spent 2 months in Mexico this spring and I made it thru he also visited in October and December for three weeks...

I felt like I was going to pass out when he went in October,,, I made it thru. Then in December somehow I did mention her.
he said she hasnt been here dont worry..
and I said this...

" I MADE A DECISION WITHIN MYSELF NOT TO WORRY ABOUT HER AND WORRY ABOUT YOU. YOU NEED TO KNOW TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT AND I CANNOT ALWAYS BE WITH YOU. WHEN YOU ARE NOT HERE I CARRY YOU WITH ME WHEREVER I GO AND ACT ACCORDINGLY AND I EXPECT YOU WILL DO THE SAME FOR ME.IF I CANT TRUST YOU THEN WHAT DO WE HAVE? AND IF YOU WOULD EVER LET ME DOWN THEN I WOULD HAVE TO MAKE A DECISION. GO FROM THERE YOU KNOW ,I CANT DO THAT EVER AGAIN. IT HURTS FAR TOO MUCH."

H: " I KNOW." ( IN A VERY QUIET SOFT VOICE)
In the spring when he was there for two months I thought if he sees her he will know that she is NOTHING COMPARED TO ME! I FOCUSED ON THAT. Or I would have been useless in my daily life it would have consumed me. It was hard but when he saw and felt the trust I gave him it helped him see how strong I really am. he told me once the more you trust me the more I want to be a better man for you....
I too wish there was some sort of delete button for :OW IN THE BRAIN.
I know it is easier said than done but try to not let her invade your thoughts too much and be the unforgettable Woman that you are. He is with you and HE chose you... be the Woman he loves and be strong.... one day at a time *( HARD AS HELL I KNOW BUT NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE ) I KNOW ~You can do it!
P.S.
MAYBE YOU ARE LIKE ME WHEN THINGS SEEM TO GOOD TO BE TRUE YOU THINK WHEN IS HE GONNA DROP ANOTHER DOOZY ON ME?
Take care sweetie.
GOD BLESS...

Bad, bad things are happening. Friend of H's is texting me. I can SO see how an EA gets started! I feel guilty about it.