Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums We're separated--What Now? Tiny Ray of Light version V

You fixate on that page as bad as I fixate on the "friend". Swallow some of your own advice bro. Tune it out. Don't focus on it as a pathway to her reality.

Just spoke to W on the phone. Asked her to consider a legal separation instead of divorce. Suggested it would be a good cool down period for both of us. She said she'd think about it.

Really. You don't say. You mean she's not so dead set on D now? She's thinking about something else? Imagine that. Hmmmm...

I really only have one thing to say man, Get your sh!t together! One way or the other you have to be READY! Come on now

Well I wouldn't say she's considering it. But she didn't yell "NO" at me. I had to call her because the riding instructor called and cancelled today's lessons.

You JUST said she's "thinking about it"

Let me tell you, when I told my counselor about my W saying that, he about fell out of his chair when compared to what she was saying. Your W is just messing with your head because you're letting her. STOP!

That pretty good advice, NM.
Damn shame you can't do what you suggested Jazz do and swallow it YOURself.

Did anyone ever tell you what an affair IS?
It IS A SYMPTOM of the deeper issues within the person having the affair but MORE IMPORTANTLY OF THE PROBLEMS WITHIN THE MARRIAGE. It's the way all the mess under the rug and all the junk inside of a person gets manifested sometimes.

You need to try to view that jerkoff-piece-of-crap-sorry-excuse-for-a-man-that-takes-up-with-married-women as exactly what he really us: A SYMPTOM. Like diarrhea.

Now it is SOLELY up to YOU whether or not the "infection" that caused the symptom festers or not.

See, that jackass is banking on you tossing your cards on the table and heading out of dodge.

What the hell are you gonna do?
Just let him HAVE YOUR WIFE AND KIDS???

For Christ's sake, I don't give a rat's ass how big your ass is, you better get the hell up off of it and fight for your family. Nobody's gonna do it for you. You might not FEEL like all that and a bag of chips right now but THIS IS YOUR TEST. You make this stand and I GUARANTEE YOU, you will begin to build your OWN self-esteem.

This is it and you can do it.

You know how I know?
'cause it TOOK BALLS TO ASK YOUR WIFE to consider just a legal separation for now. NO KIDDING! That, my dear, is NOT the heart of a quitter.

Now it's high damn time you quit letting life run over top of you.

Grab it by the friggin horns and RIDE IT.

STARTING NOW.

Uhhhhh, what she said!

Amy, there's got to be a better job for you than legal assistant! Maybe NFL coach!

Thanks for finally swinging the stick Amy. She said she felt like I was just trying to get what I want. I told her it would be good cool down time before we regretted something.

I don't see it as a balls type move...thanks for the compliment.

I saw it as fighting for what I believe in. My family.

And that's all you need for this fight.

Something to believe in.

I'm thinking staying dark is the best plan for now. Give her breathing room. She knows where I stand.

SHE ain't what needs your attention.