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Hi Dad,
wow!! It seems totally obvious to me that your WAW wants you to know everything she is doing. She wants a reaction because then she knows she is getting to you. I went dark on H...it was hard because of the kids (D5, D1) but my only conversation would revolve around them.
If H got rude and started to spew on the phone I would tell him I would not speak to him when he had that tone with me because I did not deserve it. I would hang up and then I would stick to it...if I needed to communicate I would do so through email. After a few days of this he would call to apologize.
This went on for awhile and then I needed to have a talk with him about finances and settlement stuff. I asked him to come over and he told me he would check his schedule...I never said anything about it again...about a week later he told me he had time and when he came over I was very business like. I did cry..not bawling but very teary because I was so sad things had come to this.
We went to court and I had the same business like tone. 4 days later he came to me with the revelation that he made a mistake.
My advice to you is to NOT be affected by what she is doing. I think it is horrible that she is telling the kids about her myspace and guys she is talking to on the phone. Do not get into this...protect your children from being pawns...My H tried this with the kids and I refused to "play" and it stopped immediately.
She sounds like she needs you to keep tabs on her...don't give in...the end result is not going to change. My H lived with OW and her children and totally neglected his own...over time he came around. I don't know how much stock I put into MLC..I can tell you my H was in some kind of crisis mode and needed to find himself before he could/can become my H again.
I hope this helps!

Thank you so much for all this. It helps me keep things in perspective as I am sometimes utterly baffled by the varying turn of events. My goal is to continue doing what I have been doing, simply because it is the first thing I've done in quite a while that seems to be having and effect. Not much, but at least the drama has ceased, and that big in itself. Just today, I had to brief interactions with her (less than one minute) about the kids and about a small business matter. For the first time in over a month, my wife spoke to me with scorn or contempt in her voice. Not nice so much, but neutral, which is a welcome change. I'll take what I can get. A small step? I don't know about that so much, but at least I can say it is in someway a positive.

I'm torn about the kid stuff though, but we've all been through it. My hope is that if I remain strong in my not letting her get to me in any way, she will stop letting the kids be her messenger. I don't know what it will take for my wife to come around, and maybe she never will, but I'm not ready to give up. My kids deserve me to be strong and make my Stand for our family. I will most likely endure a lot of pain, but isn't that what we do for our kids if necessary? Maybe when all is said and done, we will end up with the marriage we wanted in the first place, I just hope my wife doesn't do too much damage in the meantime.

Thanks again for sharing this with me.
DNQ