GO read the last few entries in Babybliss's thread about an encounter she's going to have with her H. There might be some things in there you can use.
You just have to act relaxed, even if you're not. Remember how free and easy it was to go out with your H when you were first married? Think and act like that even if your heart is jumping out of your chest while you're doing it. Things calm down once you're in the eye of the storm - you'll be fine
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Well we just got back from dinner and I asked him to take our D overnight. He agreed and she was excited. I needed a break. Our dinner was akward and uncomfortable. We didn't have much to talk about. He seemed fine with that though. It is very hard to act like everything is okay. I tried and I am struggling with trying to pretend to be happy. My D at dinner said that we need to say sorry and things will be fine. He just said okay and I disagree with that. She needs to understand what is going on. I told her that sometimes sorry doesn't work and daddy is living with Nana and she is living with me. He got angry with me for telling her that. Was I wrong?
I did not think that would upset him because I was just trying to tell her the truth. I am the one that has to answer those questions every night and I will not lie to her, so she will be okay and not cry. She knows that this is not her fault and we both love her. I have told her that Daddy needs to figure things out. He is not around for her to ask and if its the truth then why would it bother him?
He jsut set me this message, can anyone give advice on what he is saying....
I understand what you are saying and how you feel. It's awkward around you but it's just because I am trying to work through my stuff and I don't want to string you along..meaning I don't want to hang out with you and have you think the wrong thing as that will just hurt more. My intentions are not to hurt you by any means. I just want to work through this and see what I need. Right now I am sooo very busy with work and all that I don't have much time most of my phone conversations involve text messages so don't think you are the only one not seeing me. I am a rookie so I need to do pretty much everything. I too want what is best for Zoey but she is doing ok, and she is more concerned about you being ok rather then her. You know that I can take her whenever you need a break, I will work my work around what you need so don't be worried about that. Well I have to go, gonna give z-monster a bath and then have her call you. Lee
To be honest, it really sounds like you need to discover his Love Language. He is missing something from you, and he's trying to figure out how to get it. But he's obviously not out all the way, so just be his friend, work the LL's til you find the one he needs (you may be able to figure it out from readin the book) and use it on him discreetly. Remember, no sudden movements. Just be cool about it. Take care of yourself and your D, let him come along at his own pace. At least he's still there...
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Not sure if I can give advice or not. But I wish my W would say or send something like that. You are getting some info, not everything but seems to be trying to communicate which is great. Take your time and see where it leads.
Good luck
M 41 W 33 S8 S17 Bomb 3/11/07 S 3/28/07 New beginning? 8/31/07
What do you mean by love language? I have read and re read his e-mail and I am still confused about what he means by.....It's awkward around you but it's just because I am trying to work through my stuff and I don't want to string you along..meaning I don't want to hang out with you and have you think the wrong thing as that will just hurt more.
I am planning on researching the book. But what is peoples takes on...It's awkward around you but it's just because I am trying to work through my stuff and I don't want to string you along..meaning I don't want to hang out with you and have you think the wrong thing as that will just hurt more. I take it as he does not want to spend time with me because he is done.
