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ok W comes home from work after going to her C. (at least that's where she said she goes on tuesdays. Anyway she is in a bad mood and has short to the point conversations with me.
I am thinking back and it seems she gets this way at the start of the week every week after her tuesday apointment and by friday is usaly nce. (exept last sat.) Do you all think her C might be telling her stuff she does not want to hear?

Husband

Hey Husband,

From what you have described, it sounds like she is pissed at what she is hearing from the C. I don't think the C is validating her decisions, like you are.

Good to hear that your R with MIL is still pretty good. Mine is also, but I find it difficult to see her unless I am picking up DD for W. When I do go over there, we have a nice cuppa and good chat. She is also supportive of me, and is trying to ease W back into the M. But at end of the day blood is thicker than water, regardless.

lotsu luck,
AndyV

Husband,

My marriage did get to that "nasty" state so OW got to deal with a little more than she expected. The worst part was my children got hurt and when someone hurts my kids I turn into "mama bear."

That's good that you're seeing a pattern to some of your wife's emotions and behavior. By being aware of this you can be more prepared and will have a better understanding of it. Perhaps she's going through some emotionally difficult stuff with her C. The fact you're realizing this connection sounds really good...

Husband, you asked about detaching on my thread and whether you should ask your wife for a "status check" before you go on the camping trip. If it was me I would not confront her before you go. The fan will leave a much better taste in her mouth I would think. It's cute, and non confrontational. Just my 2cents.

Thanks andyv, root and mantilla
I get a wild hair once in a while. I wish I was more like andyv but I bet he still has his day too. I am not going to ask my W anything. Last night before bed (we are sleeping in separate rooms) we were talking about a problem WE are having with my middle Daughter. My Wife was talking and said: I need to and then corrected her self and said WE NEED TO talk to her. This is a change I noticed. My W used to correct our kids no matter how I felt. If they did something she didn't like she would put a stop to it. If they did something I didn't like she would just say well is doe not bothering me when they do that. Like my feeling don't count.
She also corrected herself last night about our finances. She started to say I am going to sell your stock to pay off the jeep. But then corrected her self and said. I want to talk to YOU about selling your stock to pay off the jeep. Now it is really easy for me to screw the meanings up and I could think. SHE wants to pay off the bills to gain her freedom. But then again I'm thinking. Well if we do have to split up our assets then at least the jeep will be paid off. I know I am reading too much into this.
It is going to be interesting when I am away for a week. We are very seldom apart overnight. (Except for her weekend affairs). Plus my son will be gone so she will have some alone time. (Unless the OM flies in from Washington) Anyway I can't wait to see how our “end of the day” night time phone calls are going to evolve. I'm kind of thinking NO relations ship talk but maybe a little Emotional stuff.
Andyv- thanks for letting me talk about Australia. It is a very interesting country. I want to go there someday.
oh yea Matilda. the Message part of the fan does not work. I am going back today go get another one. I hope they still have some pink ones left.

Husband

Wow!!!!!! Your wife is trying soooo hard. Gosh, you need to give her a big hug for that. It kind of melts my heart hearing about her correcting herself like that. I think she really cares about you and wants to make it all work out.

I am just checking in, it's good that your W is going to counseling, and yes there are some difficult issues which she must work through.

Best of luck

root
that's part of the problem. I want to give her a hug sooo bad. But have broke off physical contact. We are taking the fanily to an amusment part this weekend (overnight trip). I'm going to se how it goes I may try to hold her hand. She felt less presure awhile back when I agred to give her space and not kiss her bye in the morning or goodnight. Maybe it's time to start again?

I want to so bad but I stop myself.

Husband

I don't know about the holding hands stuff. I would wait, you don't want to pressure.

Everytime you do something that feels romantic that feels uncomfortable to her simply reminds her she is not feeling the same way 'YET'. But they don't add the YET to the sentence.

I would ease in, with maybe a touch on the back or shoulders if the opportunity strikes. Maybe helping her into a ride, or when holding a door for her. It's less assuming and less threatening, yet still requires a level of comfort that only you and her have.

Think of light hearted ways to flirt. Think first/second date. Win her a stuffed animal, share a Icecream cone, etc.

Patience.

Nextsteps

I know I know Baby steps baby steps,
you are right. Small touches. I was planing the "stuffed animal"
Plan. I have a bad leg and need to hold on to something somtimes when going down hills Sooooooooo

Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Husband