Thanks Jak.. The only problem with me saying nothing is that it just validates one of my W reasons for leaving. She says that when she has tried to open up to me in the past that I would say nothing and give her a blank stare. I do not think this is the case, maybe I did not respond as she expected but I do not believe that I sat back and just stared. I am not the shallow, insensitive boob that my W is painting me to be. She says that she is not leaving me for OM, but is leaving me for that reason and a few others.
Here is a brief run down on my day: I had breakfast with my parents, went to 5D t-ball game, saw Shrek with 5D, fixed the sprinkler system, washed my W van, and then out to my friends b-day party. I am tired.....hopefully the couch will be nice to me tonight and let me get a good nights rest. Do not know if I have mentioned this or not but since my W came back home from her brief week away I have slept on the couch.
ERC-Just my 2 cents, but I wouldn't sleep on the couch. If she is uncomfortable with you in the bed let her leave. You shouldn't put yourself out for her.
Maybe I am becoming jaded, but she is the one having the affair, not you.
Me: 44 S: 17 and 7 Final-6-13-08 I once went to a psychic who told me I would soon feel cheated......
I understand your point MC. My thinking is this about me not being in our bed. It is our M bed and rightnow there is no M. I really do not want to sleep in the bed that we have shared for the last 7+ years until she is willing to commit back to the M. She can sleep in our bed and think about all that has taken place in it - I will not.
Not a whole lot to let all you know about that occured today. Went to church with my DD's and then went to McDonalds for lunch. I have been doing projects around the house this afternoon staying away from my W. My W while I was doing projects took 5D to the store to get a gift for her teacher since she is graduating pre-school on wednesday. During this trip 5D asked who the OM was by his name. I do not know how my W responded to my 5D, but my W thinks that she heard his name from me. It is highly unlikly that this is the case since I always call him my W boyfriend or her Doc friend, rarely do I call him by his first name. Becides I do not talk about this sitch in front of my kids. Also my W found out today that I am getting a new car. When she asked what kind I told her that she will have to wait and see. To which she told me that I was not funny even though I thought that I was being funny. Maybe I should tell her that even though she thinks she is not destroying our kids lives, she indeed is. Now that is me being truthful unlike my W trying to be mean and jab me. I also did not mention yet that she is going to start paying for her own car.
I am sorry to hear about your sitch, and that your kids are in this mess, as are a lot of us.....
I just wanted to ask you a question about your W's religious beliefs. Does she know she is in sin? A really big one??? If not, I hope that God can humble her and see what damage she is doing....
Affairs are never the answer.....
~Sol
~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Single Dad, and luvin it! ~ Happiness is a state of mind ~
My W is a Christian and raised in a very spirtual household. Yes, she knows she is sinning. Her answer to her sin is that God will love her no matter where she is at. Which I agree... My W is a PK (preachers kid) and knows scripture a lot better then I do, so she keeps using her faith to justify her actions. I tried last week to have her explain what is going on in her head about this and she told me she was to tired to get into right then and that she is still figuring it all out. The question that I keep asking myself is the A worse then her using scripture to justify what she is doing? I know scripture well enough to know that either way she is sinning.... I keep praying that God will give her a revelation as to the destruction that she is creating and the possible destruction in the future. Early on she shared with me a few dreams that she had and the were straight from the story of Hosea, were Hosea put the white robe around Gomer. But instead of Hosea and Gomer it is her and I. She also told me the day that she got caught coming out of the OM hotel room that she felt God telling her not to go there... If she isn't willing to listen to God how in the world is she going to listen to anybody?
I sucks that no matter how much I try to shield my kids from all of this they are still getting exposed to it. I pray this ends soon and we can start trying to reconcile.
-ERC
Psalms 37:7-9 Wait patiently for the Lord! Wait confidently for him! Do not fret over the apparent success of a sinner, a man who carries out wicked schemes! Do not be angry and frustrated! Do not fret! That only leads to trouble! Wicked men will be wiped out, but those who rely on the Lord are the ones who will possess the land.
Her answer to her sin is that God will love her no matter where she is at.
I think they all justify it this way. That they will be forgiven so- oh well, just enjoy the sin while we can. My H says that he doesn't think God even talks to him anymore. I really wanted to say "no, you're just not willing to do what he is telling you to do". But, I keep my mouth shut.
ERC - I pray for the same thing every day. It's the one thing that we CAN do!
