Well, I had a beautiful baby boy on May 22nd. He is almost two weeks old and my husband has decided to move back in as "roommates" to help with our older son and the new baby. He will be sleeping in the basement and has made it clear that I shouldn't read anything into this, he just wants to be there for his kids. I am thankful for that but I think this is going to be really hard having him here in a "roommate" existence and not really being able to talk or interact like we once did. Should I just be thankful that he is coming back and make the best of it? Perhaps I am asking/hoping for more than is possible now, but I'm just so confused. I look at this sweet baby and my heart breaks for him, for both of my kids.
NM, Congratulations on the baby. I am sure he is beautiful.
My H was emotionally checked out when D1 was born and we lived in separate parts of the house. He left when D1 was 14 months old (I am almost 2 months into a separation.)
I would say, try to pay as much attention to baby as you can, try not to let H's drama suck you in.
Last edited by breton39; 06/03/0701:21 AM.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D
Congrats on the baby!!! What a miracle babies are.
If I were you, and I'm not even close to being able to truly empathize, so take this for what it's worth but, I'd focus on the kids. Let your husband see you happy with them and not needing him and let him come around on his own. You know you can't control him or change him, so don't even think about it and see how your focus on your kids improves and makes you feel better too. See how that goes and report back
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Thanks everyone, it is so nice to have this forum and hear words of wisdom from those that have been there. H and I are getting along fine though he remains emotionally unavailable and sleeping in the basement. I am really trying to focus on my two sweet boys and let him do his thing, though I can't help feeling terrible for him as I know he will someday regret missing these wonderful moments with his newborn. I'll keep everyone posted on any new developments.
Congrats! Read The 5 Love Languages and start following your H's language. Take things slow.....Remember, Stop Arguing, Stop Pressuring, Stop Complaining, Stop Whining, and allow him to sort his issues out. No Snooping either.
