Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis Still Pushing That @#$%ed Rock!

I know, I know. They are off today, but I expected that.

This morning was another surprise though, consensual relations! Not great, but a great stress-reliever nonetheless. Haven't seen her since then, but hey, what the heck.

There seems to be an improvement in her attitude since our talk yesterday. She came home earlier than I expected last night and wasn't smashed for once. I don't know, maybe it's the fear of being tossed out on her butt while she is still unprepared.

I am realistic here. She is very likely planning her departure. I have developed the attitude that while she is still here, at least the conflict can be put aside. Let her do what she wants to do, and enjoy any fringe benefits in the interim. My attachment to her is slowly waning away anyhow.

For all I know, she might feel like she was violated or used after this morning. She did get up to do something and came back to bed after I came onto her though. She had the choice and came back to me.

I wish I had the magic spark to rekindle things, but she talks like the damage she feels is pretty well set in stone. I feel sorry for her at times. She is chasing after a happiness that only she can obtain. She is looking to me to provide it, but it is hers to find, so I can't.

I can only make myself happy at this point. One day at a time.

Move over Fig....we'll keep each other warm.

Ummmmmmmmmmm

*shivering from the cold*

Thank you Puppy, for taking things slow, and not getting carried away.

Please don't assume what she is thinking lovey.

This morning was this morning. Tomorrow will be another day.

One foot in front of the other, Ok!

Feeling a little envious here.

I'm glad you're being realistic. Work on making you happy or at least peaceful. You're right, you can't provide it for her. I hope that when she wakes up she sees what a man your are and have been for her through this.

Oh...Sparkles and lawless!!! I truly am blessed...had I read this before church. I would have added it to my list of blessings!!!

Moonman...my stress reliever is chocolate or yoga...the positions are the same for yoga but I think your way works better!!!

Hey moon
I read this today and thought of your wife

Now it is possible that you have some deeply entrenched scarring in your life such as molestation or abuse. If these things have happened to you, your suffering is very real and understandable. A damaged self-image, compromised self-worth and negative self-truth are all to be expected...those experiencees can cause you to devalue yourself. They can lead to decades of believing youare damaged goods who no one would want for any other reason than sexual gratification. While it is wrong thinking, it is understandable. You will probably need to get professional help to overcome that-and not because you need it, but because you deserve it. Whether you ever forma relationship with someone else or not, the most important relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself. So get help, if not fo rthe sake of creating ahealthier relationship, then for the sake of creating your own peace and joy in this life.

I was reading Love smart by Dr. Phil and came across this quote that struck at the heart of me and made me think of your poor wife too.

I know it doesn't make it easier but maybe it helps explain a little.